Dear Mike Brown,
Surprise! Pluto here. I know we’ve been through a bit of a rough patch, you know with the whole booting me out of the Solar System drama of 2006. But, now that it’s been ten years, I think I’m finally ready to move on. The galaxy is much too big for such a discord, especially when there are still so many friends out there to meet.
I know many Earthlings still think of you solely as the infamous “Pluto Killer,” but to me, you’ve evolved into more than just that. Yes, you spearheaded my oust, but I’ll admit that you did so for the right reasons. For scientific rigor. Not only did you get the IAU to rethink their definitions and classifications, but you also got me to rethink my own identity, make new friends with the Kuiper kin, and come to terms with the fact that I’m no longer the edge of the Solar System. In fact, thanks to your research and recent alludes to the real Planet Nine, we’ve opened up even more of our vast Solar System. I submit to being the P9 wanna-be.
If you’d asked me ten years ago, I’d never have admitted this. I was too busy being angry, sad, lonely, and confused. It’s been a coming of age for me these past ten years, and I want you to be one of the first humans with whom I share my story with. I’m embracing the dwarf in me.