"If there hadn’t been women we’d still be squatting in a cave eating raw meat, because we made civilization in order to impress our girlfriends." Orson Welles
Last night I had a three way.

It was totally unexpected. One of those things that just happens, and you have to go with it. 

It started innocently at first – as these things often do. Hanging with a male friend on the sofa. Watching Succession. Drinking wine. Chatting. When I realized that – hang on – I have in captivity a rare and exotic creature: a straight, emotionally intelligent man I’m not dating. 

So I eased him in gently with a simple enough question. I have a girlfriend who's been ghosted by a guy, I told him. He seemed totally into her. What was going on there?

Then there was the other girlfriend, whose date was all about the texting ... but he still hadn't asked her out. What was he waiting for?

What do men REALLY think? I wanted to know. What do they want? Why is dating in New York so damn hard? So many questions. So many surprising answers. I called another friend, put her on speakerphone, and for two and a half hours the three of us discussed love, life, and relationships. Sexting. Dating apps. Being exclusive. Porn. BDSM. Badmouthing the ex. Girls who make the first move. Sex on a first date. 

Ladies, if you have anything to add, I'd be happy to ask him for you. And dudes, fire away. I'll take your questions about the female of the species to my lady hive mind. Let's do this, people. Let's have a big, old, conversational gang bang.

In other news, I’m heading to Chicago for the holiday, so there won’t be a Friday newsletter next week (and you’ll all be in a turkey coma anyway). But I’ll be back with bells on on December 6. Happy Thanksgiving, y’all. You know I love you, right?

Friends, I have vouchers to give away for The Play That Goes Wrong. Described as a hybrid between Monty Python and Sherlock Holmes, it’s a comedy where – well – everything goes wrong. The vouchers are valid for two people at performances through February. You want them? Email me at and I’ll choose the winners at random, while slipping on a banana skin and whistling ‘Always look on the bright side of life …’.

It’ll be Legen … wait for it … dary!

John Legend will be performing live at the unveiling of Bloomies' holiday windows. The info’s all here.

Friday night blues
Dance lessons followed by a full-on party. Yay! The info’s all here.

Wake up early, lazy bones!
Hills and strength training at this free morning workout in Central Park. Go get ‘em!

Toy drive
All week, you can drop off new, unwrapped toys suitable for children from three months to 17 years old at Corey Johnson’s district office. The info’s all here.
Broadway under the stars
A chance to hear performances from Dear Evan Hansen, The Illusionists, and Frozen without paying top Broadway dollar! It’s all part of the free series of concerts at Shops at Columbus Circle. The info’s all here.

Happy Thanksgiving. I hope you have a day filled with joy. 

Friendsgiving Zumba

Bring a friend – or make a new one – and work off that extra helping of stuffing at this fun class at Ailey Extension. The info’s all here.

Two Beers In
Join comedians, journalists, and politicians at the Upright Citizens Brigade as they chug beers on stage and get political. Turn up with your Trump-voter uncle and your first drink is free. The info’s all here.

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