It's February, freezing and I'm wearing two pairs of tights under everything I wear; jeans, pj's, knickers. The lot.
I want to go on holiday somewhere warm but last time I did, I lacerated my hand on a rock in the sea and couldn't afford to get stitches so I poured iodine in it and sellotaped the wound closed so I could go to the water-park. Oddly, it's put me off holidays.
But, who needs holidays when you're getting to tour your show around? Still me, but you guys need to come so I can afford a better break than holding my breath till I pass out and hoping I hallucinate somewhere sunny.
This month I'm at the Soho Theatre (12th Feb - 17th) and I don't know how it happened but the Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday are all nearly sold out. How bonkers is that? If you want to come to the Tuesday or Thursday, fill your boots, no one else is. You can get tickets here.